We can not heal from our present hurts until we understand the shadows of our past, and we cannot understand the shadows of our past until we understand the shadows of mankind in general, and by this I am speaking of the fall and the curse. While I would love to dive into the entire creation story, the fall, and the curse, I'm going to keep things a tad shorter by just focusing on the curse. If you want to read more about the former you can check out Genesis 1-3 for yourself or attend a Divine Dating seminar.
The later part of Genesis 3:16 says this:
"Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you."
Last week I heard someone say that the word desire means "control" in the original context. I have studied this several times and heard several different things, but control is undoubtedly the root of Eve's sin. You see, woman was created to be man's helper, or ezer as the original Hebrew suggests (Genesis 2:18.) However, when Eve decided to take control into her own hands by deliberately eating the fruit God told her not to eat, she sinned. She sinned and brought her husband into it too. Because of this sin, she cursed her children. Because of that her grandchildren were born sinners, and thus the entire world is now a fallen place.
And we say women have no power or significance...
If Eve wouldn't have sinned she would have helped and submitted to Adam with gladness and joy in her heart. She would love to do what she was created to do and she wouldn't have any problem doing it! But she sinned out of pride, and now she is always bent towards sin. She is cursed. The only way out of the curse, for her, or for any of us, is Jesus, the bridge. John 14:6, Jesus is the only way to get back to perfect communion with God, and it is only through God that we will be at peace with our God-given gender and marital roles (Matthew 6:33.)
Eve's curse was not put in action so that she would be brought to ruin, it was given to her to lead her into repentance and point her back to the lover of her soul, her God, who loved her and came to earth in human form to restore his relationship with her. Jesus Christ.
Back to Gary Thomas, I have never heard it interpreted this way, but he says that Old Testament commentators, Keil and Delitzsch think that the Hebrew language for the word "desire" in Genesis 3:16 translates as "a desire bordering disease."
A desire bordering disease?! Whaaaatt....that's intense but honestly I think it hits the nail on the head better than anything else I've heard. What better way to describe the sad phenomenon of young women cereal dating and giving away their bodies to every man that will have them. Of course it's a borderline disease, we think about marriage from age 3 and up! I know girls who had their wedding colors picked out in fifth grade. We are sickly obsessed with our husbands even while they are no where in sight. We struggle with contentment in every area of our lives because our happiness rests in one thing, a man, a leader, a guide of our youth. Husband.
Well here's some advice: anything you put your trust and hope in besides God is an idol, and idols always fail. So even when you get that husband you've dreamed of all these years, he's still going to fail you and he is still going to disappoint you, even to the point of tears and heartache. No man will ever bring you long-term contentment or happiness, that must come from God.
So you may be agreeing with me, but also feeling hopeless about the situation because you, like me, are inevitably cursed. Good news, if you love God then he will use that curse to your benefit (Romans 8:28.) That disease you have can be a blessing if you learn to let God control it under his provision.
- First and foremost you must give this sickening desire to God. Lay it at his feet (1 Peter 5:7.) Let go and trust him. This is much harder than it sounds, but all it takes is faith. You have to give God your heart in order to give him the desires that go with it. Think about that first, then reread this paragraph.
- AFTER you lay this down and decide to blindly trust God with your spouse, singleness, disease, etc., then you can start behaving like a godly wife or wife-to-be. If you're single like me you can write letters to your future husband, pray for him, and learn to be a trusting, helping, respectful woman of God. If you are already married then put these issues straight into practice. Pray for your husband and thank God daily for all the good qualities he has. Apologize to your husband for making him an idol with impossible standards, and commit to going to the Lord first and your husband second. God gave us a desire for our husbands...to love them, encourage them, and lift them up--so use it, just don't let Satan twist is and make it an idol issue. Matthew 22:37-40, 16:33
The other thing Gary Thomas said was that the verse sometimes translates as a "violent craving for something." That's definitely it. That's why you see women at bars flirting with all the guys. That's why she's on top of the stage showing off her goods. That's why middle school girls steal each other's boyfriends, and it's why high school girls have anorexia problems.
So here's my question for you: How long are you gonna let that curse control you? Do you want to heal? Do you want help? Do you want the everlasting satisfaction for that problem you have? Do you want Jesus...forever?