Wednesday, February 13, 2013

A Spinster's Valentines Day

Well…since Valentines comes on a Thursday and we both work and Char has class that night and Gert lives across the country now…we cannot throw a Single Ladies Bash like we did last year.


But we had to do something special for Valentines Day because it’s kind of a BIG DEAL.

We’re not going to tell you to go indulge in yourself (because we do that every other day of the week)

We’re not gonna tell you to not be sad because you don’t have a hubby to take you on a twinkly light, swanky food, never ending string of “I love you’s” date. (because let’s be honest, that would rock).

Instead, we have created a survey. Choose the answers that best fit you.

Spinster V-Day Survey

I try not to overcompensate for my singleness by being mean to people with significant others. It’s okay. Other people can have fun. Promise.

I awkwardly look at my phone while picking up food for myself on Valentines Day because I want to look like I’m meeting up with… know…someone….later….

I secretly love Valentines Day because that means there are chocolate covered pretzels EVERYWHERE.

I think it’s redundant when people call Valentines Day “Single Awareness Day” because yes, I am already very aware of my singleness on a daily basis. V-Day is no different.

I try not to punch married friends in the head when they ask, “When’s it your turn?”

I put valentines from my little brother or nephew on the fridge so that visitors know I have admirers. Hey, it isn't lying if they just assume you have a boyfriend.

I like reading the Spinster blog more than going to hang out with friends.

I am a fan of all the pink and white and red Valentines decorations hanging around Rite Aid as I wait for my prescription to be filled.

I laugh when people are sarcastic about their not so stellar love life while at the same time Netflix Sleepless in Seattle. It’s like I have a double personality. Love the idea of being in love yet hate love at the same time. Weird.

I’m mad when I “get ready” for the night then end up not going out. Showering=over-rated.

I purposefully avoid Instagram the day before, the day of, and the week after Valentines Day because I cannot, CANNOT see a single solitary gram with you and a ring. Or a heart shaped pancake. Or the daisies he sent you at work. Not a single, solitary gram.

If you said, “That’s me” Or “Yep. Sounds about right” to more than 3 of the above questions you are a Spinster.


Single looks so good on you.

-Charlotte and Gertrude
Valentines '13